How Not to Get Fired, As Told By MyCorp Employees

According to, some of the top reasons for getting fired are: unreliable work/behavior, talking too much about personal matters, an inability to do assigned tasks without numerous errors, and an inability to get along with co-workers and customers.

We here at MyCorp think our employees are great at not getting fired.

In fact, every single employee at MyCorporation right now, has never been fired from his/her current position. So we like to think of them as experts on the subject.  

With the holiday season quickly approaching, managing to not get fired is especially crucial right now!

So we asked our employees for their best tips:

“Show up on Monday morning with a great attitude and ready to work!” -Becky S.

“Be prepared to put in a little extra time at the office, whether that means coming in early to start the day or leaving later to wrap up an assignment. Be a ‘yes’ person, too, as much as possible.” – Heather T.

Some of them were more earnest than others…

“Don’t fall asleep in your car on your lunch break and not come back…” -Brenda G. 

Pretty good advice, no?

“Do not recommend your friend for the job if they are a convicted convict. Gokul moonlights as a private investigator.” -Garret B.

Some of the advice we received overlapped…

“Don’t call out sick and post pictures of yourself at the beach or a concert…” -Scott S. 

“Don’t take a sick day and then post pictures of yourself at the beach. That is especially important if you are FRIENDS with your boss on Facebook….” -Garret B. 

It’s very common to feel sick, call out of work, suddenly feel better, go to the beach, take lots of pictures, and post them to Facebook! More so than you might think!

“Show up to work all the time, not just when you feel like it.” -Tracy N. 

“Make sure you remember the security code to get back in from the bathroom.” -Marla S.

Some of the tips felt… personal.  

“Don’t tell your boss that you are giving notice about  once a month since you will be moving, and  then backing out because the buyers changed their minds… Also crying about it doesn’t help either. Really can be a buzz kill.” -Cindi S. 

Then there were those pearls of wisdom we received that went above and beyond just not getting fired: 

“Don’t drink on the job, but if you do have enough to share :)” -Gerardo G. 

Promotion, anyone?

“If you make a mistake, hide under your desk and wait it out.  Always manage to show up when something good is happening, even if you had nothing to do with it, so you can take credit for it later.” -Garret B. 

And, lastly, even when you get borderline cruel requests from your boss, MyCorp employees say you need to just buck up and deliver…

“On days when the power is out you better be up for a game of heads up 7-up.” -Eric L. 

“When Debbie tells you to dance on Payday Bagel Friday, you’d better DANCE!” -Carri B.  

Follow our advice exactly and we can guarantee that you will not get fired!*




*We absolutely cannot guarantee that.